Gosh, I haven't been on here in so long. I have almost forgotten how this all works. This is going to be a little long and wordy, but just bear with me.
On April 9, my grandfather passed away. He was on the loosing end of a battle against cancer. Even though most of my family knew he was leaving, his passing was still a surprised and we are still grief stricken.
What I wanted to share with everyone was several little events that happened that let us know he is in a better place now, but that he still looks out for us.
The day that he passed away, many of us were at the hospital, waiting to hear word from the Dr. on whether they were going to drain his lungs so he could breathe better. Complications from his disease had caused fluid to build up in his lungs. The hospital he was in is in Mexico, so visiting procedures are very different. We could only go up to see him in two's. My husband and I went up and I rubbed my grandpa's feet and told him I loved him. I said good bye to him, so that my aunts could up to see him. It was around 8:30 and my pregnant aunt and my grandmother were up there with him. My husband was pushing my son around in his stroller. I kept my eye on them and on everyone else. There was a lot of pacing around the waiting area. I saw that one of my other aunts was on her cell phone. She looked distressed. She told one of my unlces that he needed to go check on my grandparent's upstairs. The security guard on duty almost did not let him go, but he convinced the guard and went up in the elevator near by. At this time, I looked over at my son once more, it was about 8:35. I saw my son smile, then giggle and reach up at nothing as if asking to be picked up. He kept doing this.
Meanwhile everyone else was just feeling even more anguish because my uncle was not coming down to let us know what was going on. Finally another aunt convinced the guard to let her up, but he said he would not let anyone go up. I distracted the guard and my mom snuck up. The tension in the waiting room kept building because no one was coming back down. I finally threatened the guard to let me up or he was going to have to do some chasing. Well as I waited for the elevator, my heart was just pounding. I would look over at my son and he just kept giggling at the ceiling. The elevator door opened and there stood my grandma, my mom, my uncle and two aunts. My grandpa had passed away at 8:35.
In Mexico vigils begin immediately and wakes are held the day after the person passes. By day three, the person is buried. So, that night he passed,the vigil started. The vigil was at their house, and so was the wake, because he had requested that. He said he did not want to be at a funeral home. He wanted to spend his last night in his home. It was really late, but I was determined to stay up with my grandma and the rest of my family. She was going to wait until they brought his body (around 6am on the 10th). I was sitting in front of china cabinet looking thing that she has. She keeps pictures and her china in it. My son was sitting on my lap. He was facing me, then he just starts to point at something behind me and was laughing and bouncing on my lap. I turn around and it is a picture of my grandfather that has him so entertained.
My husband and I were going to be sleeping in my grandparents old room, before he got really sick. There was a picture of them in there too. Again, my son would just point at it giggle.
On the 10th, in the evening, my aunt was telling me that she was driving to her house with my 3 and 2 year old cousins. As she was getting out of her truck, the 2 year old looked in the direction of the front passenger door, and extended his arms and said "come here." My aunt told me that when she would take my grandpa in for his chemo, he would get off and then take the 2 year old out of his carseat. My cousin would usually reach out and say "come here."
My husband and I left the day of the burial. We did not get home until 2 in the morning on the 12th. I bathed my son, because it had been several days since he had a good bath. I jumped in the shower myself, exhausted from the trip. After I got out of the shower, my husband told met that he put my son to sleep. That as my son was dozing off, he started smiling and giggling. He than sat up in bed, looked up and reached out towards the ceiling to be held.Later, as I cried myself to sleep, my husband said he kept seeing my grandpa, and that this peace would just come over him. I called my grandma the next morning to tell her. She told me that my grandpa probably wanted to make sure we made it home safe.
She had a little story of her own. She said she got up early on the 12th and started cleaning up. We had rented fold up chairs for guest attending the wake. She said she folded up all the chairs and then went into another room to get the broom. When she came back one chair was unfolded in the spot where my grandpa would usually pull a chair to sit and rest.
That was one of the last events that I know about. My grandma feels that he stayed a while to reassure everyone that it was going to be okay.
Descanse en paz, mi querido viejo.